My T —
When I first see a woman, I picture her decades older.
At 80 you’ll be lovelier than even I could imagine.
How beautifully you’re growing into the echoes of yourself.
You are continually becoming you.
Though I could never wish for more than you now, just as you are.
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Each time I see you I lose myself.
Your face ripples through me.
Your voice stills me.
I live for this bliss.
You will never lose me.
(Good luck getting rid of me.)
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I spent years looking backward not forward.
Then I just stared into space.
Now I just look at you.
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One of my favorite lines from a movie:
—Don’t stand too close to people. You’ll catch their dreams.
(The character misheard though: germs not dreams, his mother said.)
I caught your dreams. You caught mine too.
Let’s keep sleeping and dreaming together.
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Of course you would have made it without me.
How grateful I feel to have seen you become who you were meant to be.
My bumblebee, who can do anything except believe she can.
My JooJooBee.
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I remember the moment I fell for you, like a pin in the universe.
I crossed off the days on my calendar like a convict back then.
(Each day a theft.)
I made you wait too long, I know, but I had to prepare for you.
I wanted to start right.
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I imagined cooking for you, everything you like, cooking with you.
(Holding your waist, kissing your neck, nuzzling your hair.)
Doing it was sweeter.
+
Someone said:
—Absence is the highest form of presence.
Fuck that guy.
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I’m grateful I found you.
I’m glad I went to you.
I’m blessed to be with you.
You changed everything.
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How crazy it seemed then.
How sane it seems now.
No, it seemed sane then too.
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When you hurt, I hurt.
—Love is enduring the pain together.
(^^Got that from a kDrama.)
Truths are everywhere.
Mostly I’m glad not to cry alone during animated films anymore.
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Love doesn’t begin to describe my feelings for you.
(As a writer I find this unacceptable.)
I will find a way to tell you.
I will show you.
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We have better than a happy ending.
It’s more than happy and it’s not ending.
— Your D